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Showing posts from July, 2014

My relationship with Coffee

I am a love-person. I love the concept of being in love despite the fact that my stance on love is almost same as that towards God. I think its overrated, obscure, too strong to be ruled out but at the same time lacks enough evidence to be rationally accepted. Hence I keep my highest degree of indifference towards these two and try not to fiddle or form/contest an opinion. Of course I believe these two ‘concepts’ are very ‘to-each-his-own things’ and are known to have done wonders to people. So it hardly matters if wonders were based on false notions or true concepts. Whatever works, works.   So yeah, I am agnostic. I feel these claims on God and love are unknowable but I neither rule out nor accept the existence of either. Life’s not so hard or different with lack of certain information on these afterall. But I know one things for which my Love (Oh I still use this word a lot for sake of common acceptance) for Coffee is unabashed.   Imagine you are a normal kid struggling bet

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

I can live in a shabby unkempt room but I can’t eat and leave dirty plates in the same room as I sleep. I can’t have curtains not drawn properly or misaligned. I can’t have hems of covers upturned unevenly. I can’t have drawers left half open. I can choose not to wash my hands after a meal but I have to put the soap evenly on both sides of my face. I have to brush my teeth on each side same number of circular rotations. I have to kick either 3 or no stones I see on the road and straighten the creases. I check my passport enroute to airport 10 times when I very well know I have checked that it’s there. I have umpteen number of times interrupted official meeting telling someone to stop fidgeting with water bottles or shaking their legs… What the hell is that? It’s called OCD- Obsessive compulsive disorder. I don’t think it’s what I have because my behavior does not fit completely to the definition; but surely its somewhere aligned in that direction. OCD is an anxiety disorder. It’s call

Five stages of grief

This too shall pass…So they say. …And you smile with thousand thoughts in your head about how ‘they’ don’t understand what you are going through. You are convinced that your situation is unique in its own way, so much so that worldly logic and past examples do not apply. You may also feel like a martyr or hero facing a completely unparalleled situation which has no precedence in world and hence, no way out. And then days pass, few or many and you realize things have sunk in. You realize you are looking back lesser and smiling more often. This may take you a week or year, the range is indefinite but you get yourself back again. Your mind wanders less to the grief that once captured every minute of your waking hour and one fine day you realize it has been days that it occurred to you that you haven’t had a thought about your ever lingering grief for days. C’est la vie! It’s true for any grief, losing a loved one, upcoming death, break-up, divorce, addiction withdrawal… anything. Time he

Somebody I used to know

As the cab turned into that lane, Mia didn’t feel awkward like she thought she would. It seemed as if this was her daily route…well it used to be. She got down at the building still painted yellow with an outlier first floor painted peach. She heard the teenage kids playing cricket pass a comment on her. She wasn’t amused or annoyed – just registered the comment. Her ‘amreekan’ getup must have given away the fact that she doesn’t belong here. The neighbourhood hadn’t changed at all, as if it was untouched all these two years. Only thing that had changed was herself probably. She moved inside the building digging into the keys attached to star-charm keychain that Naren had gifted her. She was relieved he is not going to be home. Making an entry at the register for visitors was new. The guard looked seemingly disinterested in who was visiting or what they wrote. He was only engaged in ink marks. She could have written super girl and he wouldn’t have noticed. She smiled to herself and pr